Batman Eternal #42 Review

Pictured: A thing that does not happen until the next issue.

 

Bluebird attacks, Hatter's back on the rack, Batman gives a smack, and Steph fades to black in this forty-second (don't panic) issue of DC's weekly Batman hootenanny. We discover that Mrs. Brown has awful taste in decor, vigilante action is harder than it looks, Batman's had enough of his rogues piling on, and Tim's pity party isn't bullet proof. Bluebird's action debut is a comedy of errors... or is it action of errors? Whatever it was, it was still very awesome. Who can keep track of all those pouches? Not me.

 

"Damn it, how does Deathstroke do this every night? I mean, Batman."

 

Let's start off talking about Stephanie Brown's house. Now, I'm going to assume the room she woke up in isn't actually hers, and is actually her mother's, because I refuse to believe any teen girl has a room that looks like pop art threw up all over a seventy year old woman. Those eye hurting patterns on the wall and bed spread, the pink curtains, the weird, out of place art on the walls... what is going on in the Brown household? No wonder her father turned to a life of crime!

 

That would be my reaction, too.

 

I'm loving the Harper Row approach to crimefighting: fake it 'till you make it. She's perhaps not as flexible, acrobatic, or muscle-bound as it might requires, but she has the equipment, she has the brains, and she has the guts. And fortunately for her, she's not up against the most physically strong supervillain. I think even I could probably overpower Jervis Tetch. She's just nimble enough... for me. I mean, for this. My only problem is with all those metal loops, between her earrings, nose ring, the straps for her mask, her vest, on her legs, and such. So many straps and loops! She's even got that weird chin guard thing that's now mandatory for 90 percent of DC heroes. But I guess the straps on the mask prevent it from being pulled off easily by enemies.

 

A hat would really tie the suit together.

 

Harper is an Electric-Type, I guess. I have to remember to name a Pikachu after her, or something.

 

I love when Batman swoops in and gets to the point. No dawdling, just a slap to Hatter's face, demanding to know who he's working for. Batman's a busy guy, he doesn't have time for this crap. He probably still has Riddler in his Bat Jet, Hush is sleeping it off in a fish tank in his cave, his mansion is an asylum, and hasn't slept for days. Other villains are running around using his toys to blast the city. And now he's got another dead end in the form of an invite, the same Falcone and Hush received. He's not taking shit from B-listers like Hatter.

 

"Bitch, where mah money?!"

 

Harper's talk with Tim on the roof is interesting. When Tim gives into self-pitying apologies, Harper corrects his attitude by telling him she has her own reasons for doing what she did that had nothing to do with him, asserting herself wonderfully without being overbearing. I really like the dynamic between the two, and honestly hope they have some kind of team up book. A team up book not written by anyone who's written Teen Titans for the New 52.

 

"Now let's get going to kill your parents." "What?!" "Hey, you're in the life now."

 

Meanwhile, Tim's girlfriend from a previous continuity, Stephanie, is easily overcome by Selina, though they probably could have completely cut out the part with Steph's mom in this issue and just had her awaken at Selina's place after that hired fist knocked her out last issue. Poor girl is going to get brain damage being made unconscious so often. Then again, it's Stephanie Brown, so there wouldn't be much difference.

 

This... this isn't a sexual thing, is it?

 

Okay, okay. I'm hard on Stephanie Brown. Really, I like this current incarnation. But when she does fall into trouble or gets hurt, I keep picturing that annoying pest who DC made into Robin for two minutes and then had the gall to make her Batgirl. Yuck.

 

All in all, a good issue. But it'll be great not to look at that wallpaper next time.

 

Next Issue: When Teen Girl Vigilantes Clash!

 

Story: Scott Snyder & James Tynion IV
Script: Kyle Higgins
Consulting Writers: Ray Fawkes & Tim Seeley
Art: Jed Dougherty, Goran Sudzuka, & Roger Robinson
Colors: Lee Loughridge
Lettering: Steve Wands
Cover By: Ivan Reis, Joe Prado, & Sula Moon
Editor: Chris Conroy
Asst. Editor: Dave Wielgosz
Group Editor: Mark Doyle
Batman Created By Bob K--AHAHAHAHA, NO. Batman Created By Bill Finger

 

Speaks for itself.

 


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