Family Values

What, exactly, are "family values"? You hear this a lot from politicians and clergymen. Usually conservatives tout their adherance to traditional family values. It's an interesting buzzword. It's sort of the right wing version of political correctness. I have some news to break to any halfwit who hangs on the words "family values", though: there isn't any such thing as family values.
 
No unit of people has any shared system of values. Values only exist to the individual, as well as value itself, which can only be assigned to individuals. Families, traditionally, are units that were formed with the intent of holding land and property. Somehow, in the past few decades, politicians have expoused their fondness for "traditional family values". If you value the sterile, unloving concept of merely existing to propogate the species and own material goods, that's fine. But, of course, politicians never mean that when they say "family values".
 
No, that term is nothing more than a code word for an adherance to anachronistic, narrow, white male-based, fundamentally religious, homophobic, racist, American exceptionalism. When somebody says "family values", they should end their sentence with a series of primitive grunts, as that would more clearly attune the listener to the type of mindset they're dealing with.
 
Here's a little eye-opener for you. Your family doesn't have values. If they did, they would be idiots. There's nothing more frightening than large groups of people who agree on something, let alone everything. It's severely naive to believe that there are any inherent values applicable to the family unit. The traditional family, much like traditional values of any sort, are subject to constant change. Traditions, by and large, are merely the result of a mass consciousness suffering from obsessive-compulsive tendancies.
 
So, when you hear somebody speak of family values, it's likely that individual is a completely delusional fuckwit. The proper response is to demand that they remove themselves from this world so that we may enjoy a better life without them.


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